I moved my senior year of high school to a new state. Not the ideal time to move. Seniors are not really looking to make new friends when they’re on the cusp of Blip on a radarspreading their wings and leaving the nest. It was a tough year for me. At graduation, I turned to the person seated on my right and then to the one on my left and introduced myself. Yet, if I hadn’t moved, I never would have met my husband. I also wouldn’t have learned how to “put myself out there” so to speak.

When faced with climbing a tall mountain or attempting to claw your way out of a deep pit, all you see is the obstacle of you, but if you pan out the hurdle becomes smaller and smaller. If I had one piece of advice for my boys, it’s that this moment is barely a blip on the radar. To a young teen, a breakup may seem like it’s the end Do you like me note. Check yes or no.of the world. Younger me still remembers the anguish of a crush, but older me can’t even remember the boy’s name. In the span of my life, high school breakups and a year at a new school wasn’t a disaster of epic proportions. It was more like a hard workout where muscle gets broken down. You’re sore for a couple days, but when the muscle rebuilds it comes back stronger and better defined.

Difficult situations refine you.

You learn a lot about who you are and who you aren’t so that you can boldly stand your ground with confidence.  Problems seem overwhelming, like a tidal wave that not only knocks you down but destroys the path behind you and the way in front. You may feel broken and lost but when the waters recede a clear route will reveal itself.

However, it may not be the path you intended to take. I didn’t apply for a single college in the state of Massachusetts. I wanted out as fast as I could graduate. But then, one of my few high school friends introduced me to a handsome guy with big entrepreneurial plans who drove a rusty T-bird, and I later married him. Now, I wouldn’t go back to change a single moment.

Despite how things may appear, God has a plan for you, and it will be better than anything you could have arranged yourself.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” – James 1:2-4

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